I overheard a stranger who insisted upon a point: “moms, these days are creating boys that are wuss-ified! ….wuss-ified.   wuss-ified.”

Being a mom of two boys, I placed myself on a witness stand to be judged by myself.  As if I were on trial, my bear heart surged.

Simultaneously, defensive thoughts arose to protect my ego.

GUILTY

Yes, I adore polite communication with a gentleman, of any age.  I encourage talking through anger, and I even ask the boys to walk away from a violent person.   I say, “Don’t’ fight back; just walk away.”    …Also, I praise a lion for being kind-hearted.    This may-be a cause for “wuss-ification.”

As for physical endurance, my kids are average.  Americans show a decline in physical fitness, as they get more into video games. My kids are strong-minded, educational fiends who also love video games.

INNOCENT

Holistically, you could extend the average to include all humanity and ageless capabilities, empowered by spiritual strength, and then you would never call them a “wuss!”  Ready, willing, and able to work & learn— I believe my kids and others of this century are powerfully helpful, intelligent and durable.

Also, the emotional quotient of my boys is prepared to endure physical training (on most days.)

RULING

Definite need for improvement!

Besides one sport per kid, kids need more activities to physically keep fit.

I am adding daily stretches to our morning routine.

What do you think?

Is this stranger spot-on?  Are moms are creating “wuss-ified” kids?

Do you think dads are creating “wuss-ified” kids?

Living to learn balance: www.the3keysoflife.com

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Every ounce of me wants to parent with unconditional love, so why is it difficult at times?  Conditions of “safety first” and sanitation are foremost in my consciousness.  Also, I want kids to show respect.  Even simplified goals, such as these are not simple in practice.  So, I question:  what has love got to do with it?

Love is the essence of being…

Can this theory apply to every life lesson?  As I learn to love parenting, I am challenged to live in love.  I want to spread healing love over myself and my children.  How?

Here is what I have found as truth.  If I am performing household chores, with a love for tidiness, then kids are likely to help.  If I am gardening, with love for earth’s sweetness, then kids are likely to help.  As soon as I am out of balance, looking for help from the kids, they stare at me.  If I am not showing love, they are opposed to the idea that they should help in any way, shape or form.

Purpose and clarity seem to come from balanced living and love.  I recently gained clarity from an experience with Tantra Yoga.  Daily, I am practicing a bit of Tantra.

Tantra Yoga is blissful.  I uncovered a special guide, who understands passion.  Her words are insightful.  She is lovely; and I am closer to living in love, due to a single encounter with her.  Go ahead and view her work at http://www.theworldoftantra.com/

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Hell NO, the irony was not lost on me. Right there at the TSA screening station at Burbank airport. Me, in a tshirt, shorts and flip flops, hair in pony tail, no makeup. One boy on the floor, sprawled out on top of his overstuffed backpack, feet flailing, shoes thrown about.

He can’t get his shoes back on himself after removing them for security.

Sigh.

Ten years ago I was THAT business traveler, the one trying to smile politely at me?…with my laptop and heels, trying to dodge that mom that was about to lose it. Trying to make my flight, so I could make my meeting.

The circle of life, ladies and gentlemen.

Don’t forget who is really in control here. Call it karma or something else, but these moments are sure to knock me to my core, for more than one reason.

I learned another valuable lesson yesterday, not just that life changes dramatically in the blink of an eye. Or in ten years of motherhood…

But lets first go to the beginning of the story (it’s more dramatic that way…)

Three boys…end of summer…Stay At Home Mom…the makings of a disaster of epic proportions. Call in the National Guard. I’m DONE.

After BEGGING the Universe for help, it came to me “STOP ASKING THE UNIVERSE – ASK THE GRANDPARENTS!”

Ahhh, yes! The grandparents. The ones who raised my husband. The ones who love my children! They will help!

After coordinating schedules, draining a portion of the IRA, and packing for days, the boys were headed to the In Law’s for five fun filled days and nights while I regain my sanity.

Getting to the airport shouldn’t be hard…sending them off should make me giddy with delight. But before I get THERE, I must face a cancelled flight, a two hour delayed alternate flight, and three and a half hours of “enlightenment” at the airport with two 7 year olds and a 10 year old. I’m not getting off easy, folks!!

But, alas, here is that second lesson. After (finally!) watching my kids board that plane without me, I felt something. Something different than the bliss I was expecting. What is this?

I bit my lip, kept the tears tucked away, and begged (silently) for the crew to deliver them safely to their destination. My kids + my heart x 3.

The lesson wasn’t wasted on this mommy. I’m blessed.

And I’m going to enjoy the HELL out of these next five days.

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My kids are asking me to redesign our lives to live sustainably.  Stepping up to the challenge, I am empowered to coach by their creativity and love for our Earth.  The kids’ desire to reduce and re-use things is strong.  They are teaching me to how to tap into a passion for going green permanently.  This seems to be a new way to bond: sharing love for supporting life.

Sustainability made easy is a BIG goal.  Investigating native animals and plants, we are redesigning our house and yard toward survival among nature.  We want to blur the line between nature and our home.

The over-abundance of energy possessed by kids is critical.  Kids need to create, build and destroy.  They are ready and willing to work.  Vermicomposting or worm farming is a favorite, so far.  Does anyone have more kid friendly, nature jobs?   I am looking for local farming jobs in and beyond our back yard…

Local public schools, such as Westlake Elementary, are supporting kids’ efforts to farm and recycle.  The Growing Place is also a preschool in Westlake Village that offers kids a chance to support growing plants and animals.  Classrooms and teachers will be critical to making kids’ humanitarian goals stick.

Do you know any local schools or teachers that live to give back to mother Earth? Please tell me!

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Over the last month, I have devised a new way to spank my kids.  It is not equivalent to the, “love pat.”  Modern spanking, in my house, involves lots of love and total compassion.  The spanking is delivered lightly and without injury.  There is only one goal behind the spanking:  laughter.

I say, “Rapid-Fire Spank Bottom!”  …whenever, I sense a change in disposition is necessary.  I am serious; I am not accepting their current behavior!

Communication is key to positive discipline and relationships…  However, kids are not always open for discussion.  My boys seem to love this interaction.  First, the spanking is delivered.  Second, we are both laughing.  After we settle down, we discuss optional ways to achieve their goal(s).

I do not spank, if I have an ounce of anger or fear.  I believe my kids desperately search my intentions.  I want them to understand my spanking is a diversion from unwanted behavior.  Skipping the battle of wills and power struggle, we are laughing into the next moment.  After the spanking session, they are ready to listen; or they are ready for a time-out.

Do you think this type of approach is healthy?  Instead of spanking or squeezing a wrist to get their attention, I am basically tickling them into submission.  Laughter leads to positive discussions.

Most panels and posts on spanking children for disciplinary purposes agree that physical harm is not the best means of getting a point across.  I believe positive discipline and laughter are my best means of parental influence…  Spanking is just for fun.

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